Have a seat. Get comfy.  Take over the whole room. Go on. Stay for a while. It’s been years.  No one will notice you or comment on your appearance, on how you ended up here, who had the nerve, the very nerve, to invite you anyway?…( were you even invited?)  How long are you planning on staying? If you are lucky,I will arrive at just the right time and make mention of you being here.  I will say the wrong thing at the right time…or vice versa. I will comment on the obvious. Loudly. It will be the first thing out of my mouth.   I will ask you all kinds of questions and expect detailed answers. I might even challenge your answers.  I will, without question, make judgements and offer up options on how to best deal with your presense. Your big being.  I will not ignore you, though others will wish( please Gloria, please, just shut-up) I would.   We will go head to head and toe to toe.  Make nice with that elephant. Gloria, make nice with that elephant ! After time, you will not even notice the elephant here. There. Right there.  From time to time, someone( could you?,Gloria, please?) will clean up after it-feed it, offer up a beverage, entertain it…..

You will begin to notice how others react to you, Mr. Elephant. ( or is it Ms.?) Or not.  You will wonder why no one else is saying anything.(Shhhhhhhhhhh, don’t, for God’s sake make it mad, Gloria  )Doesn’t anybody want to know? Isn’t anybody just a little curious?

Wait.  Where is everybody going?  Wait.  Wait one minute.  Everybody breathe.  Everybody just wait a fucking minute!!! You there in the corner.  Turn around. Say hello.  Meet and greet.  You?  This is an elephant.  E-l-e-p-h-a-n-t.  This is not a zebra. or a monkey…or anything else you wish would take it’s place. Hey, put the bottle down.  An elephant is an elephant-no matter how blurry your vision.  AND YOU?!  It is not the devil-this is not a war for God to fight.  This one’s for you.  Put the Bible down and just deal with the elephant.  And you.  You.  This is your family. Are you the one who invited this elephant?  For whatever reason.  Please.   Please.  Is anyone besides me interested in how the damn elephant is feeling?  Just a little interested in how and why?   Why?  Why not?   WHY NOT?

Hello?

Hello???! HELLOOOOOO?

(dead silence)

It is only me and the elephant.

Great.

It’s going to be a long night.